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auntie conversation
in reading a heartbreaking blog of a friend whose family are being hateful, i was thankful that, though my family can be trying, at least they're not mean to us. we don't talk or see each other often enough, they might not ever "get us" and might make dumb comments but there's no uncurrent of nasty, judgemental disapproval or childish head games. it makes me sad to hear that adults can be this way to one of their own.

it also reminded me that i hadn't blogged about my conversation with my aunt, nor the second conversation i'd had with my mother within a month. neither caused any great excitement, which is why i didn't rush to document the event, but i figured i should, after procrastinating for so long.

first, i called my mom to ask if she could put up my friends who were visiting shanghai next month. the conversation went well as she asked for details about the visit and then asked about val. wow! she showed interest but not in the grandmotherly way. 'sok, baby steps. she did lament again that she still hasn't sent anything, but eh, that's her procrastinating. hrm, wonder where i get that from?

she hadn't talked to my aunt, which was a little disappointing, but i'm not sure how often they talk either and really, i just wasn't in the mood to get worked up over it.

it was time. i called my aunt's cell phone and found her shopping with one of my grandmother's oldest friends, yook gah paw paw. i had always liked her, one of the few grandmothers who could speak english and actually listened to my answers with interest. she lived in nyc, played tennis and was just adorable, always warm and welcoming. she was also always delighted that i knew her as the zha zha noong grandmother, shanghainese for thank you. while i've hardly seen her more than a handful of times, there's always a special place in my heart for her.

anyway, my aunt handed the phone over to her so i could say hello. when i asked how she was, she said, "i'm ok, hey, i'm 85, what do you think?" and laughed. still rad, i see. =D i think i'd like to be her when i get old.

since she was distracted, it was a little difficult to have a real conversation, which, in hindsight, was probably not a bad thing. it was quick and fast, i'll try to see if i can remember it.

me: hello?
aunt: hello?
me: hello?
aunt: hello?
me: it's andrea.
aunt: hi! why are you calling me? i was just thinking about calling you! funny you call me!
me: haha!
aunt: i'm shopping with yook gah paw paw, say hello!
me: nooo, that's ok, uh, hi, yook gah paw paw.

exchange pleasantries, paw paw says, you called to talk to your auntie, bye!

aunt: hello?
me: (blurt) hey, we had a baby.
aunt: whaaa? you adopted? going to?
me: no, we had one, two months ago.
aunt: what? who gave birth? you?
me: NO!
aunt: liz?
me: yes! (why the hell would you think me?)
aunt: is it yours?
me: yes!
aunt: you had it?
me: no!
aunt: how come you didn't tell me?
me: we didn't tell anyone.
aunt: oh. why? how...?
me: (ugh) whaddya mean why? it's what couples do when they want kids.
aunt: how?
me: (?!) sperm, we bought sperm.
aunt: you bought the worm?
me: what? worm? no! sperm. sperm!
aunt: why didn't you adopt me?
me: (sigh, she's always on the lookout for someone to take care of her) hello, you're not a baby!
aunt: do you need anything?
me: yes, i need someone to come speak chinese to my baby!
aunt: (mumble in background) what?
me: never mind.
aunt: how much did you pay for the worm? (insert unclear story about how she has a friend who spent $10k to either buy sperm, harvest eggs or be a surrogate, i couldn't figure it out. like i said, it was all very fast and disjointed.)
me: huh?

several clarifying volleys later, i think i finally figured out that she has a friend who was going to pay $10k for someone to be their surrogate.

me: that's cheap!
aunt: hey, i should've had him give you his worm...sperm...and had liz carry it. you could share!
me: (words like "cockamamie", "stupid", "annoying" and "argh" go through my head) why would be want to do that?!
aunt: ha, no? ok! (asks details about the baby, i oblige.)
me: ok, i'll let you go.
aunt: ok, ok! bye! want to go to china? i have frequent flier miles! oh! everyone is coming to the east coast for xmas again, boston! you go?
me: kid?
aunt: oh, ok, think about it, bye!

according to my call log, that was an 8.5 minute long conversation. phew, a record.
posted by winking bunny at 5:56 PM :: ::